jeliza

Took the kids to see Detective Pikachu, which was fun. It was similarly paced, and somewhat similarly plotted, to the traditional Pokemon animated movies I endured watched with the kids when they were little, but waaaay more fun, and the visuals are great. It's going to be *better* if you know some of the pokemon (the use of Explouds is epic) but I think will still be reasonably fun even if they are just random creatures to you.

I plan to miss most of the movies that we saw previews for, except I'm gonna try and see in the new Godzilla in the theater.

The day leading up to the movie was a series of fails and hopelessness, but I'm going to try and take the post-movie good mood and run with it.

Today was the day of Dan's sleep deprivation EEG test, which meant that, even though we broke the keeping-him-awake time into shifts, I only got 4 hours of sleep last night, on top of a long accumulation of underslept nights. And went to PT in the morning (I graduated to all standing exercises!)

I feel asleep in my chair while he slept for the EEG.  We get results on Tuesday, though as I have poked around more I think this might have been a ruling-things-out test rather than a diagnosis confirming test, but at least it is forward motion.

Because of this, I will be heading super early at Norweson tomorrow to put up my art show stuff, and then coming home and dropping my car, which has lost the ability to find 2nd gear, off at the mechanic, and then maybe a nap, and then helping finish the kids' costumes for Sakuracon on Saturday.

If you are going to be there, O is going as "Sand Planet" Hatsune Miku (best costume ever, she will wear everything again in regular life but the wig), and D is going as the Prince from Hat in Time. He will be recognizable as himself; when you put a big teal wig on O, though, it gets more challenging to pick her out of a crowd. (There are always at least 3 Mikus wandering around.)

I will be at Norwescon Sunday late afternoon for art show checkout, but am badgeless.

We are meeting with the school in person tomorrow about the Recent Fuckery which I'm hopeful will be fruitful.  We discussed it in general terms with the family therapist today and he shared our surprise that at a school to which bullies get sent that Dodgeball would feature heavily in the gym rotation, which makes me feel a bit better.

I am going to see Ocean's 8 on Friday with a bunch of lady friends/acquaintances; luckily, I have ascertained that we are NOT dressing for the occasion, as I am not sure my one remaining fancy dress would actually fit.

Actually made it to the gym this morning as planned!

Most of my "stopping now" weights used to be my warm-up weights. Ouch. I made a new fitocracy account for tracking because I want the progress cookies for motivation, which will take forever to happen with my old workouts there as comparison.

The gym has slightly improved -- they adding rowing machines! And they have this thing of water in the front that spins as you row which I at first thought was cheesy as hell but it turns out it gets 95% of the way to sounding like actual rowing (with a hint of washing machine) which makes things far more pleasant.

Also, they've stopped playing music. More gyms should do this. I didn't notice any TVs either, but I avoid the "cardio machine" area of the gym like the plague (rowing machines have their own corner away from the treadmills and bikes and ellipticals.) so I might have missed it.

I don't like the absence of morning nap, nor how stiff I am in the mornings (my first rowing set was downright painful), but dang, I am in fact totally awake and energetic now.

OMG. #Hamilton This production is amazing and the theater is absolutely packed.



I pulled this ring out of stock so I could look fancy and I'm not convinced it shouldn't just go right into my own jewelry box.

About to see Azam Ali and Niyaz! I am ridiculously pleased.
http://ift.tt/2mSFLp2


I made two video; it's unlisted because I heard two different things about the recording policy, and am trying to figure out if it is okay to post all the way publicly:



This is the long one I haven't IDed the song of yet (bad fan!) with really awesome instrumental solos

And this is Tam e eshq (taste of love):

Our educational afternoon: Fahrenheit 451 at the Driftwood Players.



O really liked it, and wants to read the book, so I will be finding/picking up a copy ASAP. D & the friend he brought along (R got sick and couldn't come) seemed not quite as excited, but liked it. Definitely the all noted it was a little challenging to know that so many of the lines were references but knowing almost none of them; I have to admit that I only recognized about half where I could actually put a title to it.

It was a nice, albeit clearly small town theater, production. There is something very special about the physicality of live theater.

My oldest niece got married yesterday, in a BEEYOTIFUL garden wedding on the farm where she lives on Bainbridge.
My pictures aren't pretty (my camera phone sucks, and I have lost my mojo, and they have an awesome photographer so I'm sure there will be great pics eventually and mostly didn't bother) but I got a few, though apparently none of the brides. (x-posted from instagram. I was going to claim I update instagram more often than LJ, but then I looked at my datestamps. Ooops.):

(this is mostly just noodling for my own benefit, since maybe if I write it down I'll have to think about it less.)

The weird silver lining of when my depression was less controlled was that when the world is dulled, I didn't care that much about how I present to the world as long as it isn't very feminine. Clothes must be physically comfortable, always, but hitting a more precise zone in the masculine/butch/unmarkedandrogynous/both-and-androgynous/womanlybutnotveryfeminine space isn't an issue. Given that I default to jeans+tank top+maybe a sweather and have visible boobs/hips, that last one is where I tended to land out of sheer apathy.

But when my mind is clearer, it becomes an issue.

And makeup has become amusing again, in a "drawing lines on my face" and "bright colors are my jam" kind of way.
And it is summer, when sundresses are just so damn easy (I am not made for heat. Also, I found nifty soft knit dresses which are super comfy.)
And I am starting to care about looking like not-a-slob more if I go out where people can see me. Even if it means that I dress like a 20something art student, I'd like to look like I'm doing it on purpose.

This means that I am having to devote far more processing cycles than I want to what else I am doing with presentation. Is the funny colored mohawk going to be sufficient to balance the dress AND lipstick? Do I need to shave my head completely? Are there even sandals that aren't ugly and aren't feminine (and can handle a lift) in the world or is my emotional comfort going to demand a summer of sweaty feet in boots/sneakers?

And does all this angsting mean I need to be pondering that whole identity thing again (seriously, I did my therapy time already), which seems in many ways pointless because whether the label is cis or gender-something, it will have pretty much no practical effect given how my life is structured?  Or are my appearance preferences just frosting that doesn't need to affect the flavor of the gender-identity cake, so I can just go think about whether I should concentrate on charcoal or digital drawing instead?

I really wish I didn't care. I have so many other things I could be doing with the brain time.

We went to see Scotto Moore's new comedy Balconies at the Annex Theater last night. I recommend it. It wasn't a mind-bender like Duel of the Linguist Mages or When I come to my senses, I'm Alive, it was more straight up funny in a Noel Coward kind of tradition. Those with a background in game/software development and/or an interest in crazy celebrity watching (the scientology parodying was not even trying to be subtle) will particularly enjoy it, I think.  It's Annex, so it isn't super-polished, but it is also affordable and fun.